Okay! For starters: your wife's clit sounds like every clit in the universe. They are finicky, persnickety little monsters capable of great pleasure and great discomfort. They, not unlike the women they are attached to, require nuanced care and careful attention.
First and foremost: does she own any toys? It is super important to be in touch with your own body and to feel what it's like to bring yourself to orgasm manually. BUT, if we're thinking of this like a distance race (we are, apparently) practice and exercise will make things easier in the long run. Something that vibrates will make this happen quickly. If you and your wife have never owned a toy before, I'd recommend starting with something small and un-intimidating at first, like a classic bullet. This can be used on her own or together and is a great way to warm up.
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